TOO Big

Why do law profs wear clothes that are a size or two too big? Has there been a secret mass wasting disease that attacked the school and they are all wasting away? (I want this disease! How do I get it? [don't answer that])

The point is: buy clothes that fit, and get rid of clothes that don't. This makes you shop more often, which I know is such a drain on you braniacs! But your clothes will fit! You will feel hip and young! You will live longer!

Yes, you heard it here first: shopping will help you live longer. Trust us.